A Hand in Need
by astraplain
Summary: Ianto knew it was a bad idea from the moment it entered his head. AU, set just before the start of series 1. Third story in the Steadfast Tin Soldier series.


Ianto removed the glove quickly, returning it to the case and slamming the lid closed. With the box secured and returned to Suzie's workstation, he stumbled to the sofa and dropped onto it, breathing hard. His right hand was too warm and felt like it was covered in ants.

"Idiot," he chided himself. He knew the glove was dangerous it was wrong to resurrect the dead and yet Lisa.

He didn't have to close his eyes to see her covered in blood and metal although his dreams replayed the images anyway. Sometimes he wondered if he'd ever be able to remember her without visions of that last day.

He rubbed at his hand, thankful that the crawling sensation was fading. It was too late or too early or too something for this nonsense. He should be in bed, resting, even if he couldn't sleep. Instead, he'd kept himself busy, skulking around the Hub waiting for Suzie to leave. Jack was out, probably on a roof somewhere, and this was the first chance he'd had to examine the glove alone.

It was a bad idea from the moment it entered his head, and he knew it. Still, the thought of bringing someone back, even for a few minutes. Of being able to say those last words not stupid things about plans for the evening or buying more toothpaste.

A chance to say goodbye.

A vision overtook him Lisa on the autopsy table, eyes wide, screaming as he held the glove against her head. She'd beg him to help and then die again in pain and terror. And he'd be just as helpless, just as useless as he'd been the first time.

Ianto got up slowly, nauseated and exhausted, his heart pounding. His damaged leg faltered and he almost fell, just managing to catch himself on the edge of Tosh's desk. Pain flared through him and tears blurred his vision.

Dammit, dammit, dammit.

He couldn't do this; couldn't give in to this ridiculous weakness. Lisa was dead. He was crippled. That was how things were. The glove was evil a seductive bit of cruelty that would do only harm.

He could see what it was doing to Suzie making her possessive and more secretive. He'd felt a bit like that himself the last few days desiring the damned glove until it was all he could think of. He'd barely been able to wait to get his hands on the thing, his fingers curling with pure want. He'd even made excuses to pass Suzie's desk just to be a little closer to it.

Ianto leaned against the railing, overcome with disgust at himself. How could he have let that thing become important enough that it sent him sneaking around in the middle of the night? What would he have done with the thing anyway? Lisa was gone, buried. He was far away, trying to get on with his life.

He glanced back at the box, unable to suppress a shudder. Death was nothing to play with; hadn't he seen that for himself in Torchwood Tower?

A thunk from over head startled him and he looked up, watching as the invisible lift descended, carrying a somewhat bedraggled Jack. Apparently it was raining.

"Playing in the rain again?" Ianto didn't have to force the smile he wore for his captain. He hurried over as quickly as he leg would allow and took Jack's coat as he stepped off the lift.

"Can't resist puddles," Jack countered, his voice rough, with the weather or fatigue possibly both. "What are you doing up?"

"Insomnia. It's all the rage. Shall I fix you a coffee?"

"I'll get it. You should go back to bed. Tomorrow will be a long one."

"They're all long. Come on, we'll split a cup and then we can both get some sleep." Ianto took a few towels out of the supply cabinet tucked into a corner. He'd stocked it with an array of items that were handy to keep close at hand. It saved him some extra steps, an effort that was especially appreciated at the end of a long day.

"Dry off a bit and then go get changed. I'll have the coffee ready by the time you get back."

Jack obeyed, amused by how often Ianto gave him orders, but he hesitated as he set the towels on hook Ianto had installed for that purpose.

"Are you alright?" He brushed a hand against Ianto's forehead. "You're pale."

"Long night," Ianto assured him, managing a smile. "Go on or you'll be the one who's ill."

Jack grinned, heading off to do as he'd been told while Ianto fixed coffee. As predicted, it was ready by the time Jack returned wearing a t-shirt and old pants with fraying cuffs. Ianto made a mental note to mend them.

"It's not just insomnia, is it?" Jack asked as they settled onto the comfortable old sofa. Ianto leaned into him, hesitating only a moment before resting against Jack, allowing the man to put an arm around him.

"It's the glove " Ianto started slowly, trying to put some order to his chaotic thoughts.

"You tried it on." Jack tightened his hold on Ianto and offered him the cup of coffee they were sharing, just as he'd done several times when they were sharing a hotel room in London. "Is it out of your system now? Or do you want to experiment with it like Suzie?"

"Once was enough," Ianto assured him, taking a sip of the coffee to steady himself. There was a long comfortable silence while he worked out what to say next and Ianto was grateful for Jack's understanding. There were no comfortable silences at Torchwood One, no patient waiting while you struggled to find words to explain the unexplainable.

"I think you should destroy it," he said at last. "Or at least lock it in the secure vault."

"Suzie's determined to study it, to learn how to use it."

"I don't think the glove can be controlled. Not the way she thinks it can." Ianto turned haunted eyes towards Jack. Can you imagine if Torchwood One had gotten their hands on it?" He pulled away slightly, his expression deadly serious. "It's not my place to decide, but I think it's dangerous." Ianto turned to look at the case. "It could disappear tonight. Into the vaults."

"It probably should," Jack agreed, resting a hand on Ianto's shoulder. "But I promised Suzie that she could study it for two weeks. She's been distant lately, not like herself. The glove has her interested again. I'll give her the time I promised, and then I'll lock it away."

Ianto nodded, accepting Jack's decision. He was still unsettled and couldn't help but glance towards Suzie's desk. Jack pulled his attention back with a warm hand on his leg.

"I'll watch her," Jack promised. He stood up and offered a hand to help Ianto up. "Join me? I've got some massage oil I want to try on that leg of yours."

Ianto nodded once, allowing Jack to lead him towards his bed. As they passed Suzie's desk, Ianto made his own vow to keep an eye on her. Jack took care of him, took care of his team. It was up to Ianto to take care of Jack.

::end::


End file.
